Monday, September 24, 2007

Help Wanted

Help Wanted

The Jordanian press and publication department is looking for qualified candidates to fill in a number of vacant positions available for a recently enacted domestic surveillance program.

Positions entail spaying on electronic media websites, blogs, web pages, electronic news beaurues, correspondences, news bulletins, comments, chats, announcements, and electronic press releases.

Qualified candidates must posses an excellent command of the English language, must be willing to engage the bloggers into a lively desirable discussions for the purpose of entrapping them. This isn’t a nine to five position, a designated spy must be available on a twenty four to forty eight hours shifts. When the story breaks so will the spy be ready to report on the flurry electronic activities about it.

The position offers a basic salary and plenty of commission incentives, the more people you turn in the higher your income will be. Our goal is to shut the mouths as well as the spirit of those nonconforming so called electronic media journalists.

In the past we have been successful at shutting the print journalists as well as defining delineated borders for the video and audio journalist personnel, we expect to have the same level of success if not better, faster, and more swifter at the electronic media.

For immediate consideration forward “ironically” via electronic media your curriculum vita outlining your qualification, interests, and goals. Only applicants that demonstrate the highest degree of becoming excellent spies will be considered for the positions, and will be invited for further processing and training on the best methods of how to spot violators of electronic media journalists and bring them to justice.

If you aren’t self confident well rounded spy willing to turn in the most intimate person to you;then you need not bother applying for any of these open positions, this isn’t for the feign hearted individual.

Interested applicants need not worry about public exposure, confidentiality is of a paramount importance to the press and publication department, all reporting and turning in people will be done in highly covert operations, you need not worry about being exposed.

We encourage young talented English proficient male and female Jordanians to take advantage of this rare opportunity, applications will be reviewed on first come first serve order, don’t let this excellent opportunity pass you by, hurry, the time to become a highly paid spy is now. Experience is not necessary, nor is it a requirement.


7ala said...

Hehehehe wallah if the salary is good i will think about it, its a good job becoz i always read blogs so I will take advantage of the time i spend reading blogs :-)

Hatem Abunimeh said...

What if it is on a pro bono publico basis, would you still do it. It is a sure way of showing your patriotism.

Who's-sane! said...

ouch, that's gotta hurt!

Well played, hatem!