Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Lethargy

I don't know what is going on with me lately but the feeling of lethargy has taken over my life. I'm hoping that it might be the Ramadan period is what contributed to this lethargic feeling, but I'll have to wait and see what happens when the fasting is over.

You can't imagine how bad it has gotten lately, I just hate to do anything, I feel that the smallest task is in my view a huge chore. All I want to do is cut corners and minimize the tasks to the lowest possible level that it can be minimized.

I have not cut the grass around the house for a long time, I didn't trim the bushes,prune the trees, or collect the falling leaves. I didn't wash my car, change its oil, or even put windshield cleaning liquid in it.

I didn't buy any Eid clothing for my children, heck, I didn't even polish my shoes for ages. I hate to loosen the necktie all the way so I don't have to re tie it the next time I want to wear it again.

My to do list has become several pages long, some of the items on my to do list is fairly new while other items are carry over from previous years, yet, all of it is still outstanding.

Sometimes I think that may be I'm depressed and I need to go on vacation to freshen up and rejuvenate myself, but the sooner I think about it the sooner that I forget about it and get up the next day much earlier than the previous day so I can make it to work on time.

Last time I got a hair cut was based on increased demand by my wife and by my secretary at work, they both urged me to find the time to cut my hair because I looked like a monster in their eyes.

I'm not busy at all, my job isn't very demanding, my wife and my children very much maintain themselves by themselves, they do need me to provide the necessary revenue to keep the household moving, but beyond that point they don't ask for too much of support other than what I'm able to give.

I'm financially stable, I don't have money problem, I mean I'm not rich at all but I earn enough to secure a decent life for me and for my family, so it couldn't have been a financial problem.

I don't know what to do next or what kind of changes do I need to make to get out of the lethargic state of affairs that I'm living in right now. I'm hoping that something will click and alter my mood.

I can't vouch as to when will this something click, this week, next week, or even never. I'm not really worried about this status because my life is moving as if nothing is happening and I'm the only one who is aware of this situation and this is the first time that I decided to write about it in a spontaneous fashion.

I didn't plan to write about this topic at all, I was planning to write about the national agenda and what changes it may inspire after its revelation next week, but some how & for some odd reason I found myself writing about my lethargy and the lethargic feeling that I'm going through.

5 comments:

abdelstar alslimat said...

Vacation is the way out

hareega said...

dude do some blood work and go on a vacation, when you come back the blood tests will come back too. That's plan A

let's not talk about plan B now :D

Ziad said...

I feel the same way, I'm worn out! I was going to post about it too :)

I think the answer is an extended change of routine, like a six-months vacation! I also found that reduced caffeine intake contributes to it as well :)

Ziad said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Hatem Abunimeh said...

Thanks abdelstar, hareega, and ziad for sharing your thoughts. I already feel much better. I discovred that the problem was ennui.